I spent my childhood in Jakarta. Sometimes, we went for a holiday in Yogyakarta - and we would visit our paternal grandma's grave. There was only one gravestone there, and that was grandma's. That was why one day I asked where grandpa's grave was. Father answered that grandpa's grave was in Semarang - but we never visited it. Something happened around 1984, when I was about 8 year-old, third grade, and I always remembered it. One day, father and I were looking through our family's photo album. When we stumbled upon a significantly larger photograph of grandpa, father told me, "If you see this man when you're on a bus, or when you're walking, quickly call him, okay? Tell him that you are his grandson, the son of Bima!" I was confused, and I said, "Really? But grandpa has passed away, right?" This question apparently struck father and he then kept silent. Only now I can understand the context: that father has always been hoping to find grandpa alive. This is what differentiates a missing subject and a dead one. Rangga Purbaya #1965setiaphari #living1965
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This is Luweng Grubug, a vertical cave located in Wonosari, Gunung Kidul, Yogyakarta. It is known as a killing location of communist party members and supporters. Between November 1965 to January 1966, around 1500 people have been killed in this place. In the beginning of the reformation period just after the fall of Soeharto, my father and mother immediately joined the research team formed by the Foundation for the Research into Victims of the 1965-1966 Killings (YPKP 65). Luweng Grubug is an outcome of their investigation and research with the YPKP 65 team. Therefore, especially for my father’s generation, Luweng Grubug is an answer, an end point for their probings. However, for me, this is not an end point at all. Luweng Grubug becomes a starting point for me, for many other questions regarding my missing grandfather’s background, and why he had to be disappeared. Rangga Purbaya #1965setiaphari #living1965 Dayu is my cousin, the son of my aunt Niniek. I took this photograph for the exhibition Stories Left Untold in iCan Gallery, Yogyakarta, in 2015. That day, I went to my aunt Niniek’s house in Jakarta to interview her about our family’s life after grandfather was gone. I have met Dayu previously on a separate occasion, and he was willing to be photographed for the work that I would prepared for the show.
After the interview with Bu Niniek, I went with Dayu to a junior high school in East Jakarta. Dayu is a trainer for their soccer team. After the photo session, we talked about grandfather. I told him about grandfather’s history since the beginning of his career as a teacher in Tamansiswa, the period of war for the independence, his activity in BTI, Scouting and his job as an agrarian counsellor. Besides telling the story I also asked what he knows about grandfather. Like my other cousins, Dayu knew that grandfather was missing in 1965 but he did not know what really happened. It was the first time we spoke about grandfather. Dayu said, “He is my pride forever, and not to be hidden and ignored.” Rangga Purbaya #1965setiaphari #living 1965 |
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